Note: Mr. Mott is one of the greatest and funniest teachers ever. His stories are always the greatest. However, I never wrote them down so I can share the hilarity with you. So... yeah, the point is. He's funny. These quotes don't do him justice.

"SING! is not masturbation."

Mr. Mott: "When it gets nice outside, I may want to take this class to the park."
Some kid in English: "Are you allowed to do that?"
Mr. Mott: "No. But, they didn't say anything about it to me. So, I'll pretend I didn't know we couldn't."

[re: class discussion about Amanda in The Glass Menagerie]
Oleg: "I just think she is just a bitch who doesn't love her children."
Mr. Mott: "Go to the bathroom."
Oleg: "What?"
Mr. Mott: "Go to the bathroom, and don't come back into this classroom until you know why I sent you to the bathroom."

<to Oleg> "It's a real car, asshole."

[re: telling us a story about him being stuck in East New York]
Ann Shi: "Wait, what ethnicity were they?"
Mr. Mott: "BLACK!"

"I may have survived the Fulton Street thing, but I don't think I can survive jail."

[re: something about talking to a 70-year-old woman who asked him if it was cool to go to a hotel room with a 80-year-old man and if it was a good idea to let him kiss her and touch her]
"...and by the time you undress, he's already through."

"Mr. La Bonne... He has issues."

[re: lawyers]
"They're so boring looking and they walk like Oleg."

Mr. Mott: "The more intellectual you are, the bigger your--"
Andre: "WHAT?!"
Mr. Mott: "View. What the hell did you think I was talking about?"