[Note: My favorite high school teacher. I almost majored in American Studies because of her. Almost.]

[re: the class finds out she's getting married.]
Some girl in History: "Is he Jewish?"
Ms. Plafker: <laughs> "You're worse than my mother."

[re: telling us about when she first heard the word "orgasm"]
"I remember I mixed it up with another word, and when I was little, I was like <childish voice> 'people have orgasms.'"

[re: talking about WWII and island hopping]
"It was like leap frog. You've all played leap frog, right? Before you graduate, you hafta play leap frog. Leap frog is very fun... but World War II is not."

"I can't even get you guys to do homework, how can I spread something?"

[re: The Red Scare group is presenting. Whenever a group presents their term project, Ms. Plafker interjects once in a while]
Ms. Plafker: <saying something about the Red Scare>
Bailey: "Shhhhh." <motions his hands at her>
Ms. Plafker: <gasps and looks surprised and amused... and slightly offended>

"It's no secret that Americans have the worst education in the world."

"Where do the priorities lie... lay? Education, American. Terrible."

"...And then there are blowjobs..." <looking at the class reactions> "Some of you are like <stoner voice> 'Huh? What? Blowjobs?' and some of you are like <smirking> 'blowjobs...'"

[re: Bashing President Bush with various statistics]
"I don't want you to think I'm overly-biased... but I'm just giving you the facts!"

"This is one of the benefits of being a teacher. I get to subject my opinions on all of you and you all have to listen to me speak."

"So during his second term pregnancy -- blppp -- presidency..."

"Everyone understands what I'm saying right? I mean, I'm just giving you an oversimplification to what it actually is."