"So how long is the Moby Dick thing?" - Carol T

[re: the paramecium in biology lab]
"It's moving! It's moving!" - Samantha M

"Oh! Mary! Alana! <stares at me> ...boy..." - Qian C

"Did you know there's a town called Dildo? It's in Canada. Imagine the slogan: 'Dildo... Come experience the REAL Canada.'" - Qian C

"Intercourse: The pleasure of Pennsylvania." - Qian C

"David, keep your pants on!" - Alana C-B

"Ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever." - Alana C-B

"Am I blushing?" - Alana C-B

"Tsk... kids today..." - Oya W

"I love Jake." - Alana C-B

[next week]
"I hate Jake." - Alana C-B

[the following week]
"I love Jake." - Alana C-B

[the week after that]
"I hate Jake." - Alana C-B

[re: the endless tech staircases]
"Too... many... stairs... Can you feel the burn, David? Can you?" - Alana C-B

[re: strangers hooking up]
"I think we should get to know each other first. Okay, my favorite color is blue, let's make out." - Duber

"Don't stand up! You stand up and minus ten on your next exam!" - Mr. Dalessandro (9th grade music teacher)

[to some guy in the library who Alana kept staring at]
"Hey, you there, yeah you, my friend Alana here would like you to keep bending over so she can gawk at your ass. Thanks!" - Duber

"You know if you bend over, it'd be easier." - Jason W

"I'm so screwed, I'm practically pregnant!" - Alana C-B

"You gotta wake up sometime!" - Alana C-B

"I'll tell you what I want if you tell me what you want.. WOAH! Okay..." - Qian C

"So David, wanna do it on the floor?" - Alana C-B

"You... you... Freshie you!" - [Sophomore] Amy

"I didn't think he was my cousin! I thought he was my sister's cousin!" - Alana C-B